Hello Again

So wow...I forgot I had a blog. I have been using facebook as a place to do everything. Anyone else get caught in that loop? I see people saying that they are shutting their facebook down on the daily...I have done this myself. We recognize that we are spending far too much "time" in there...and yet we keep doing it. We say we are shutting it down, time to focus on ourselves, stop being addicted to the info...mmmm but the connection. Its so sweet isn't it? It's what we were craving, no? Remember when we were younger with our beepers, or our myspace (mmm myspace with music apps and our own wallpaper and fonts), our notes passed in school. I kept those fr the longest time...slipped to you by a friend of a friend in a hallway or on your desk. But SHHHH don't get caught. Oh the horror if you were caught...if your notes were read out loud? Or the wrong person got ahold of it. THIS MESSAGE WILL SELF DESTRUCT. lol. but now we have an inbox, chat. email, instagram, twitter, email, snapchat, vines, etc...We want more. But we also want less. To be connected. That's what the root is though isn't it?   To connect out...outside ourselves to get back inside ourselves. lol its funny. God. provides all that we desire ...and sometimes it gets to be too much...

Too much, that's what I have been contemplating today. I am a Scorpio..and so my mind has to tear apart and process all things big or small...to see where I feel the most. Feelings junky? maybe. I like it though. Life is a puzzle that inevitably we wont really know whats what till we do. This life? Maybe...but most likely not. When things do become too much what do you do to process them done? I play in the dirt, stand in some water,  watch a sproutlet reach for the sun and zen out into whatever IT is I am overly thinking about. I do not try to repress my feelings or thoughts. I WANT them. They are there for a reason and who am I to deny energy that ants to flow through? I will sit with my feelings and thoughts until they become something or until it subsides and flows away like dust in the wind...and try to watch it till it disappears. I am finding that this is sometimes hard for people around me to understand or bare at times. Watching me sit in this energy puddle of my own minds making, but everyone has their way to process their MUCHNESS.

The word that keeps reappear to me...for myself and others that I have talked to this week...is SHINE. What does that mean and how can you achieve this when you aren't feeling it? hmmmm good questions. To shine is akin to walking in your power. To feel the great central sun shining on you and through you. It propels you to move forward. No matter what is trying or has gotten you down. To find that silver lining within and make the steps..even baby ones...to pull that through and out your eyes. so you can filter through all that is blocking your light. Not to repress it...that's like mucky water. Tar pit style stuff...that is the opposite of what I mean. So here's an example: your heart is broke. It just happened its fresh. You are FEELING it and its hard to feel anything else. That's ok. FEEL it, go within it, grab onto it and ride it like a wave. Be safe and surround yourself with anything material that helps you remember who you are WHILE you ride that  wave (music, incense, friends that can hold unconditional unjudgemental space for you, water to stay hydrated, fruit, ice cream?, journal, go for a drive, go for a walk, go dancing, scream, etc). No woe is me stuff. No self deprecating statements. No looking for others to join your pity party. Cause you cant ride a wave as a victim. You must ride the wave as a survivor...adventurer...warrior...with courage and love of yourself, Confidence. And as you are riding that wave a certain grace hits you. Though you might still be feeling feelings you acknowledge you are doing it with grace. And so enters your SHINE. You have worked out that feelings are normal...and part of this human experience, you have worked out how to walk through the tar with grace, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel in your imagination, you can see there are blessings in those parts that cut deep. Very intense teachers those pains can be. And thus your heart slowly starts to open and through those new LENSES...your eyes...you Shine...Magic. Transcendence. And guess what? we have gazillions of opportunities to hone in our shiny skills. Every day we are presented with ways to be more shiny. To live in that space of new choices and magic is possible.
I love you all...we are all co-creating this massive reality. It was my guiding message two years ago....TIME to SHINE Ina. now I get what that means.